…telling the Hilarious Story of How Dani’s Son was Born

Dani: Oh man, I wonder if my water broke. It’s three weeks early from the due date at this point. So, I get in my car and I drive to their house because we were going to lunch.
QL: This story is stressing me out.
Dani: I’m in no pain. I’m in no distress. What so ever. I’m probably in complete denial at this point so as I said I get in the car and I drive to his house. [gasp in the audience] I know, I know, I know…
Eric: So ladies when your water brakes just cruise on over. I got your back. I’m all gonna get you some nipple cream… tampon pads…
QL: And a widwife.
Dani: Well..
Eric: No. Tell the story.
Dani: Anyway. I go over to his house and the boys had gone motorcycle riding in the morning and Dave was already there so I go over there and I walk in and his wife Sarah says ‘Oh, I think your belly dropped.’ that tends to happen before the baby comes.
Eric: Cos she’s a doctor.
Dani: Well, no, but she had a baby four and half months before so she knew… and I was like ‘Ah, you think? Cos also my panties are wet.’ and she was like ‘Dani, I think maybe your water broke you should call the doctor.’ And I was in complete denial. Thought it can’t be it was three weeks early. As if that never happens. Anyway, I called a doctor, she confirmed it.
Eric: A disaster! In the meantime I’m buying Hot Sauce at Ralph’s.
Dani: I was like ‘Hey, Sarah, I didn’t bring a change with me. Do you have a pad or something I could use to protect myself with’ and she goes ‘No, I don’t I just had a baby and not using them right now.’ so she calls Eric and she goes ‘Eric, can you get Dani some pads. Some like heavy flow pads.
QL: Eric knows all about this stuff. He’s an expert now.
Dani: And he goes ‘Tampon Pads?’ and Sarah goes ‘No, no, those are distinctively two different things.’ in the meantime she’s standing outside the door of the bathroom where I’m sitting and I’m going ‘What is he asking?’ and she was ‘He thinks it’s the same thing. It’s ok. He’ll bring the right thing. Don’t worry.’ And that’s the story of my son being born.

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